Some Things Transcend (Fiction)
The second book of the 6-book Princes' Game series covering the Chatcaavan War.
Publication Data
- Series: Princes' Game
- Book: 2
- Publication Date: July 2014
- Editions: Ebook, Paperback, Audio
- Revisions: several
Blurb
Given a choice, Lisinthir Nase Galare would have stayed in the Chatcaavan Empire to help its reformed Emperor and Queen remake the worlds in their image. But when his presence proved a threat to the Emperor’s attempts, he bowed to necessity and accepted an exile that he thought would kill him… for what was left, without duty and the company of the beloved? Adding insult to injury, his escort home included two psychiatrists, as if he were something broken and in need of therapy… and one of them was another Eldritch. Did they expect him to spill his soul to anyone without the courage to make his sacrifices, and to a member of a species he now considered completely craven? And would he even have the chance, when the Emperor’s enemies had a vested interest in never letting him see the other side of the border?
Xenotherapists Jahir and Vasiht’h of the novels _Mindtouch_ and _Mindline_ make a guest appearance in this second book of the Princes’ Game, and the game is as large as the fate of three nations and millions of worlds. Perhaps there’s a role for an additional prince on the playing field….
Tags and Content Notes
- Tags: psychology, high stakes politics, asexual, kink, furries, elves (space)
- Rating: R for violence, sexual situations
Buy Links
- http://books2read.com/u/b6Kjp3
- https://mcahogarth.bandcamp.com/album/some-things-transcend-princes-game-2
Synopsis
In a Nutshell
Having been sent away due to his very presence being a threat to the Emperor's power, Lisinthir bows to the necessity of leaving, but he isn't happy about it. What's worse, he's being pursued by factions hostile to the Emperor, and his ride contains two xenotherapists, the very last kind of people he wants to see.
Chapter One
Vasiht'h and Jahir are awoken in the middle of the night by a comm request. It's the Eldritch Queen. She brushes off concerns about them being ill-attired and submits a request: go to meet the former Alliance Ambassador ad'Chatcaavan Empire at the border. He's carrying critical information that may help the Alliance win the inevitable confrontation with the Chatcaava. Vasiht'h guesses he needs therapy as well, and the Queen elaborates that he's been in the Empire for almost a year. They are shocked, since their last communication with said Ambassador was right before he freed the slaves, refusing to leave. Then, the Queen names him: Lisinthir Nase Galare. She implores them to go with all speed and will count it as a personal favor if they do. Jahir accepts, and the Queen signs off with an invocation to the Goddess and Lord. It takes them a moment to recover from the shock, but Jahir moves to pack and Vasiht'h moves with him. The Glaseah makes a joke that Jahir doesn't laugh at, reflecting the seriousness of the situation.
The ship taking them to the border runs at top speed Well's Deep, and Jahir senses the strain the ship is under, getting them to the station in under a day. They disembark and are met nearly immediately by Admiral Alon Levy, who guides them to the Quicklance while speculating on why the Chatcaava sent the Ambassador back. When they get on, they are met by Healer-assist Borden, the senior and only medical officer on board, who guides them to their cabin and leaves. They settle in, and, after briefly inquiring about Levy, Vasiht'h asks if Jahir ever knew Lisinthir. Both had assumed that the Ambassador left after freeing the slaves, but now they wonder why he stayed and how he survived. Vasiht'h decides to see about tea, and Jahir gets started on the information on data tablets left for them, which calms them. The information is from the Ambassadorial Service, detailing that not only did Lisinthir stay and not be punished, but he also freed another, larger group of slaves several months later and negotiated several treaty amendments, but was either silent or bland as to his methods. Appended to the end was a curt statement from a Fleet Intelligence agent trapped in the court harem: that he had befriended the Chatcaavan Slave Queen, and through her learned a lot of how politics operated. She warns that he won't come back the same, and to prepare for that. Noting a lot of talking around subjects, Vasiht'h observes that the appropriate security clearances will become meaningless once they lay a hand on Lisinthir.
The next day, they try to do what research they could, with Vasiht'h trying to find Chatcaavan culture information on the u-banks while Jahir re-reads correspondence with the Ambassador. Jahir laments that they didn't say much to each other, and can't get much of Lisinthir's personality. They pore over the words and phrases used. Jahir reflects on the idea of sending a Glaseah to the Chatcaava, but Vasiht'h accidentally provokes a defensive posture from Jahir when he remarks offhand that he wouldn't want to go. When pressed, Jahir first remarks that Vasiht'h was afraid to go, and Vasiht'h expounds on the possibilities of the Ambassador's state as to why. When Vasiht'h asks again, Jahir remarks simply that he's an Eldritch, only explaining (under further questioning) that the "bad business" with the Imthereli lands would make Lisinthir have something to prove or be resentful, plus he's a touch-telepath among violent people. Further, he emphasizes that Lisinthir's observation about the Chatcaava may have been through touching and therefore taking something of the Chatcaava into himself. Finally, in contrast to Jahir himself, Lisinthir went into the Empire alone, and is therefore most likely to have significant psychic trauma. Jahir then reveals that he has a touch of the Galare pattern-sense, so he can say that his own pattern-sense had kicked in the moment when Vasiht'h involved them in a Fleet case long ago. It's possible that the Queen offered Lisinthir to the Alliance as the best opportunity to effect a positive outcome in a conflict to come. It's also possible that they may be sacrificed to effect this outcome.
The two meet Captain Raynor, and Vasiht'h asks him if he knows anything about the politics among Chatcaava and the past ambassadors. Jahir asks who sent the Ambassador back and why, and Raynor guesses he got too good. Both Jahir and Vasiht'h wonder how, but before they can speculate too much, there is an alarm: They are in range of the escort, and it's under attack.
Chapter Two
Lisinthir wants to be alone, since he's exiled from the one thing he'd unexpectedly found, and that may aid his recuperation from alcohol and hekkret addiction and not eating enough to keep himself healthy. He's having withdrawal symptoms and generally feels horrible, when the floor drops out from under him, and he eventually deduces the ship is under attack. After grabbing some weapons, he heads to the bridge. Entering unnoticed, he's able to discern some information before being directly addressed by the ship's captain, who admonishes him for not being below. Lisinthir, however, asks why the vessel is under attack: presumably to kill him, but to what end? Especially since the people who he knows would, Second and Third, are both dead. After an officer reports that they're aiming to breach, Lisinthir offers to find someone to question and is dismissed. With a purpose, Lisinthir draws his sword and goes hunting.
Judging by how their ship is now involved in the battle, Jahir figures that the Ambassador is still in play to the Chatcaava. He is called to go with a boarding party to fetch the Ambassador; Vasiht'h goes with him. Jahir is given a weapon. the two go over the Pad to the cramped Chatcaavan vessel, with the fight in progress. They don't attract much attention, but they do take some wounds as they run into Chatcaava. In the cargo hold they find Lisinthir, savagely fighting Chatcaava. During the fight, Jahir notices that Lisinthir is talking to his enemies, and possibly torturing them by cutting off wings and hands. Jahir calls for him, and Lisinthir grabs him by the shirt, and makes as if to kiss him, but stops, refocuses, and asks who Jahir is with an accent. Vasiht'h implores them to go, before the Chatcaava take an interest in the Fleet ship they came on.
Disoriented, Lisinthir tries to figure out who this strange Eldritch was, since he hadn't extracted the information he needs. Seeing a Glaseah pulls him from his narrow focus, and he sees all the Alliance citizens. Duty bids him go with the uniforms, though he finds himself chafing at using Universal again. Taking the rear, he notices this strange Eldritch and the Glaseah moving together as if tied together. When they finally reach the Pad, Lisinthir hesitates, since that would mean he is exiled for good. He crosses over into the impersonally clean and "wrong" Fleet vessel, demandin to be taken to the bridge, though he has to say it twice, since the first time he defaulted to Chatcaavan. Once there, he asks who they're fighting, then how many fighters there are, noting briefly that the other Eldritch and his Glaseahn companion followed him. When he figures out the ship configuration, he orders the Captain to flee, since there are too many fighters for that vessel, so there must be another hidden one. The ship rocks, and, as he tries to warn them of the coming danger, he loses consciousness.
Jahir ignores Vasiht'h's panic as he helps the Seersa load the Ambassador onto a pallet, following her out of the bridge. He notes that Lisinthir is borderline emaciated, skin an unhealthy grey, and his hair growing brittle near the roots. Getting to the clinic, he helps the Seersa load Lisinthir into a halo-arch. The readings indicate multiple drugs coursing through the Ambassador's body, something the Healer-assist was not trained for. Jahir flips through the medical test results as he, Jahir, and Borden discuss Lisinthir's horrid condition and Jahir asks for some additional tests, requesting the others to expose the Ambassador's wounds. He notes the alcohol abuse and some strange lung damage, along with his digestion being damaged. Suddenly, the lights fail, then switch to emergency lighting. Borden exits, and Vasiht'h implores Jahir to sit. When he does, they try to make sense of Lisinthir's condition, then Vasiht'h asks for and receives a hug.
Chapter Three
Lisinthir flashes back to a time when he and the Emperor idly talk about Chatcaavan fighters. The Emperor learned trust in the Navy, and also tells Lisinthir of the micro-cultures within Chatcaavan society and the difference between Throneworld culture and Navy culture. Unlike himself and Lisinthir, the Empire "exists... between the winners of the last battle and the losers preparing for the next match." As such, he constantly sets them against one another to distract them from destroying greater targets. Setting the Navy versus the system defense forces won the Emperor the throne. However, the Emperor elaborates that while he could unify the Chatcaava against the Alliance, the plunder distribution would splinter the Chatcaava and leave them prey to an Alliance victory. Back to the original point, the Emperor tells Lisinthir that the fighters exist not to destroy ships, but to deliver pilots to board the ships.
Lisinthir wakes, immobilized under the halo-arch. He notices someone else in the room (the Seersa, who is obviously injured) and that the room is lit only by emergency lighting. When the Seersa checks the readings on the halo-arch, she is surprised as she notices him being awake. Lisinthir attempts to get information from her on the attack, though when he asks about how many boarders got on board, he instead gets how many Fleet personnel died (four). Still, this tells him some useful information: they aren't after prisoners, so they were after some political aim, and were probably trying to reduce the amount of personnel that could work on repairs, which meant that reinforcements weren't numerous. Attempting to get more information from Borden causes her to ask why he isn't curious about his own health, and from her he gets the names of the people who are in primary care of him: Jahir and Vasiht'h. Lisinthir briefly speculates as to who summoned them on his behalf before learning they're xenotherapists. He doesn't want fixing, nor does he need it. So, to appease Borden, he asks her to tell him about his health and prognosis.
Vasiht'h and Jahir are in their quarters, getting a rundown on the situation from the Captain: the engines are down, and the chief engineer was one of the fatalities. Raynor also informs them they ran not toward the border, but further into border space, though within patrol routes for Dusted Fleet ships. With a suggestion that the two of them get some sleep, he leaves. Vasiht'h, via the mindline, asks Jahir's opinion, who agrees that they would be best served by attempting sleep. They do, but have uncomfortable dreams, then rise to spell Borden.
However, the patient was not in the clinic. He'd apparently been released roughly two hours ago, and the two wake Borden to figure out why. It seems the Ambassador talked the healer-assist into letting him leave the clinic, which seems initially absurd to Vasiht'h before he's reminded that said Ambassador has been living by his wits in the Chatcaavan Empire for nearly a year. They go to track him down.
Unsure of what to expect from his House cousin, finding him lounging in a chair with his feet on the coffee table wasn't it, particularly with something smelling sweet and acrid in the air and alcohol in a tumbler by his elbow. Vasiht'h assumes drinking, but Jahir also remembers the lung damage and suggests smoking. They are invited inside, and Jahir has to suppress his first powerful instinct to dress down Lisinthir, since he is acting as a therapist, not as one Eldritch noble to another. Lisinthir asks for his name, and when given it, throws out a comment about possibly seducing Jahir's mother, tangentially mentioning Imthereli's fiscal/familial troubles. Resisting the attempt to make the conversation about himself, Jahir tells the Ambassador that he should be in the clinic, and takes Lisinthir's tumbler before he can drink again. When the Ambassador asks about Jahir's next move, Vasiht'h interjects that they were sent to see to Lisinthir's mental health, and Jahir emphasizes that the Ambassador is in dire health straits. Lisinthir continues to resist, and Jahir finally gives up and fights Lisinthir on the ground of Eldritch peer to Eldritch peer. Finally, Lisinthir gives a little, and suggests portable medical equipment. Jahir emphasizes that he submit to treatment, and Vasiht'h clarifies physical treatment when they both feel the Ambassador's mood shift from relaxed to violent. Lisinthir relaxes, though notes that Jahir is taking the brandy with him, and kicks them out.
The two take a breather from the battle, Jahir unsettled that the shared background of Galare noble heirs was used against him. Vasiht'h tells Jahir that Lisinthir will probably just disable the genie in his room, but Jahir suggests disabling it entirely, citing the Ambassador's evident issue with food, his body, and alcohol. The two agree that he needs help.
Chapter Four
Lisinthir finds himself surprised that Jahir had actually carried off his tumbler. Having finally felt comfortable, he reflects that he had not respected fellow Eldritch, and the last Eldritch he'd met that wasn't a dragon in an Eldritch seeming was Bethsaida, who was a captive and at a really low point. He assesses his experiences with this new Eldritch, counting in his favor his spine and fire of spirit, also reflecting on the deeply hidden yearning and desire in this other Eldritch. Curious, since the Seni Galare scion would be quite the prize, he wonders if he has a wife, why he's in the Alliance, and also about this Glaseah who is permanently yoked to him. Idly, he wonders further why Jahir left the homeworld and what would have possessed a Glaseah to accept any Eldritch, much less this one, into his life and mind.
The door chimes, and in walks Captain Raynor, moving Lisinthir to a more respectful pose than his feet up on the table. Taking the seat vacated by Jahir, Raynor introduces himself and asks why the Chatcaava want him, considering he was just sent away. Lisinthir opines that there are now factions within the Chatcaava, and the faction after him has some use for him, also that the ship was disabled specifically so they could buy time to search for it. Agreeing with Lisinthir that repairs are going to take time, Raynor asks if the Chatcaava are going to realize they fled toward them instead of away, and Lisinthir remarks that it would be a surprise, though also that the other ship is probably destroyed and two ships are now in pursuit of him. At Raynor's request, Lisinthir gives the Captain an education in the capabilities of the ships they left behind.
Borden informs Vasiht'h and Jahir that the Ambassador won't be able to use the genie anyway, since the ship is going dark. Borden offers them some food via protein bars (Vasiht'h declines) and asks them how their patient is doing, saying further that she doesn't have the experience necessary to handle him, since the Ambassador hasn't internalized that he's post-traumatic yet (and Jahir agrees via mindline). Borden happily volunteers to help with physical stuff, but also notes that the Captain is going to want reports on how the Chatcaava work, since they might all die, and the Captain can get off a high-speed buoy to Fleet repeaters. Jahir brings up the portable medical equipment, and, as he gets it, Vasiht'h notes that he can sense thoughts Jahir has that he doesn't want to share, wondering what category these particular thoughts fell under, since he knew some of that fell under his feelings regarding Sediryl. He also figures that Jahir is attracted to Lisinthir, and can't imagine what kind of scandal this would be back home.
Jahir checks the equipment, and Borden emphasizes that even though the clinic will get priority, the equipment should be used sparingly. Jahir assents, but expects that the Ambassador will crash significantly when his body finishes metabolizing whatever he's taking (and Vasiht'h sends that he might still have some with him). Borden logs them out and sends the on their way with the equipment and a sack of protein bars. Vasiht'h feels the unspoken thoughts like a clogged drain, but counsels himself to patience while they get to their own room. He looks at the protein bars, again lamenting the lack of kitchen to make food in. Jahir agrees, but elaborates that he'd also like to be away from here, specifically because he might be the wrong person for this particular case since he and Lisinthir are too similar in rank and family. When reminded that the Queen suggested it might do Lisinthir good to be connected with the person he was speaking to initially, Jahir says that the Queen doesn't personally know him and thusly doesn't know his issues and how they might interfere. Vasiht'h hugs Jahir, then volunteers to take the Ambassador case solo, but Jahir declines, saying they can do it until they get back to Alliance space. Vasiht'h then pushes a protein bar onto Jahir, and finishes the one he started earlier.
Chapter Five
Flashback: The Emperor, Lisinthir, and the Slave Queen are lying on the balcony after a session, the former in between the other two and the fall. The Emperor reveals to Lisinthir that the Throneworld is not the Homeworld, and they came here to conquer, especially since spaceborne industry is a huge undertaking. However, the Slave Queen tells of other stories, specifically religious ones, which leads to a conversation about the Chatcaavan religion: The Living Air. The Emperor says that the Chatcaava worship themselves now. Lisinthir wonders how the Empire is kept unified, and the Emperor tells him that while he holds everything together with the Navy, previous Emperors have not. He offers that separating into different political entities is a possibility. He foresees it not changing, and on that note, Lisinthir wakes.
He is experiencing pain in his gut, something that's happened before and would inevitably pass, and idly wonders when he will be checked up on. Some time later, enough that the sweat has cooled on his skin, his door opens and Borden dives for him. She admonishes him and openly regrets not keeping him in the clinic, though Lisinthir charms her some with a joke. Studying the results of a diagnostic, Borden moves to call "his specialists" and he excuses himself to the bathroom. By the time Borden's finished her call, he's back in the room and affecting ease. Borden is glad that he's not her patient, and he laughs as the therapists enter. Vasiht'h is skeptical when Borden reports that she found him collapsed. Lisinthir again attempts to be charmingly obtuse, when Jahir finally comes into the frame. He's silent, but does give a very subtle tell in the form of a stiff finger across the back of the tablet. Borden excuses herself and leaves.
Vasiht'h comments on Lisinthir's ability to divert attention from things he doesn't want to discuss, guessing it helped him among the Chatcaava. Since they haven't earned him sharing anything, he gives a non-answer that draws on the Glaseah living with an Eldritch. Vasiht'h calls him out since he's doing it again, telling him they can't help him if he doesn't let him (which assumes he wants the help). Vasiht'h continues that he is free to seek other counseling (or not) when they get back to Alliance space. In the meantime, Vasiht'h offers to separate medical and mental treatments. Lisinthir frames this as them letting him go, which strikes Vasiht'h as suggestive, but Jahir breaks in, noting that therapy requires consent of the participants. Going back to the physical ailments, Jahir administers some fluids and vitamins, and after Vasiht'h inquires as to Lisinthir's condition and if he has anything to share, Jahir wonders aloud if the Chatcaava will find them. Lisinthir tells them that the longer they drift, the worse their odds are, and they leave after saying they'll check back in a few hours. Lisinthir is put off by what seemed like an easy concession, but then goes for his luggage.
Outside the room, Vasiht'h asks Jahir for the next move, since Jahir was feeding the Glaseah lines throughout the encounter. Jahir talks over his plan: to reenter the room in about 15 minutes since the equipment has detected Lisinthir's headache, and he figures that whatever Lisinthir has, he's going to use it. Jahir's objective is to get a sample of whatever it is that Lisinthir is using to medicate himself since they're currently fighting symptoms only. This is worth damaging their tenuous relationship since whatever the substance is is currently destroying his alimentary canal, and is preventing him from retaining fluids. Vasiht'h is horrified, and agrees to reenter the room. After some offhand comments and laments that there aren't enough cookies in the world for their current situation, they reenter via medical override.
Jahir immediately spots the brown cigarette, telling Lisinthir he's come for it. Lisinthir attempts to bait Jahir (and Vasiht'h cautions Jahir about it), then takes another drag. Jahir grabs the cigarette, and Lisinthir grabs him and pulls his arm behind his back with a speed "honed by...violence". Jahir waves off Vasiht'h via mindline, since he can feel Lisinthir's utter calm through their skins. Lisinthir reclaims the cigarette, then eases up, apologizing that the response was out of proportion to the insult. Jahir, however, asks for the drug back, but Lisinthir refuses. Channeling the anger from fought addiction before and seen its effects, he hooks Lisinthir's foot to cause him to fall. He loses a moment, and finds himself on the ground with the Ambassador on top of him, pinning his forearm to the floor with his knee, and that there are suddenly knives. Jahir finds himself disturbed by how peaceful he feels when Vasiht'h intervenes, and the Ambassador releases Jahir's throat and pushes his palm against the ground very deliberately, shivering. After Lisinthir makes sure to differentiate his fear from Jahir's in Eldren, he rolls off the other Eldritch and apologizes to Vasiht'h in Universal. The Glaseah objects to the Ambassador wearing claw-knives, of all things, in the Alliance but Lisinthir objects that he's only been in the Alliance for a few days, and Jahir chimes in that he sent the claw knives to the Ambassador.
Briefly, Jahir loses the difference between the mindline and reality, and mentions to Vasiht'h's concern that Lisinthir pulled the blow. Lisinthir mentions that he almost didn't, but also is standing considerably far away from either of them as Jahir attempts to get up and apologize for his role in the encounter. However, Vasiht'h is looking at him like a stranger, and Lisinthir approaches him like he's some wounded animal. He reaches out to touch Jahir, then stops, completing the motion when he sees something in Jahir's eyes. Jahir asks him what he sees, and he replies "A man who doesn't know himself... and wants to" in Eldren. Vasiht'h, tense, suggests they both go to the clinic, Jahir for his wrist and Lisinthir to be fed by a halo-arch, and Lisinthir not only acquieses, but gives Vasiht'h the cigarette he and Jahir had fought over.
Lisinthir watches Vasiht'h help Jahir up, noting that Jahir seems like he's a masochist. He isn't sure how Jahir is going to deal with that when faced with Eldritch noble culture, plus is aware that Vasiht'h, the asexual Glaseah, won't be able to help Jahir with these particular needs. At the clinic, he allows himself onto the second halo-arch and notes Jahir and Vasiht'h talking without words before it finally spills into audible words. Jahir asks if the head or gut is bothering him and Lisinthir answers that it's both. Jahir starts to get into a further examination but is prodded by Vasiht'h to let the halo-arch finish its examination. The two talk more without words, then focus on him, with Jahir emphasizing that he isn't absorbing nutrition. Lisinthir brushes this off since it isn't immediately killing him. Jahir asks what the cigarette is, and Lisinthir tells him that it's hekkret, with this preparation being theraputic. Jahir guesses that some preparation of the same drug is poisoning him, guessing that the smoking is forming a limited immunity. Thanking Lisinthir for giving the drug to them, he gets an AAP and administers to Lisinthir a painkiller. Stating that his liver can't handle much more and that he needs some way to manage the pain, Lisinthir suggests a lover, but there is no one available. He is asked if he has any STDs, and deflects, saying he'd be surprised to have one. Jahir agrees, and Lisinthir lays down as bid, wondering both what he would do about Jahir's problem and why he was considering doing anything about it. He admits to himself a fascination with Jahir's dichotomous nature of being both a healer and fighter, Eldritch and xenophile. Further, he finds himself very much wanting to dig under Jahir's surface and pry out whatever he finds.
Chapter Six
Vasiht'h is extremely grateful that Jahir was too busy with his own thoughts to have an inkling into his, as they are thrashing about all over the place. He knows Lisinthir pulled something out of Jahir that, had they seen it in one of their clients, they would have referred to a specialist for sexual dysfunction. Vasiht'h is inclined toward referring Jahir himself to one of those specialists, but they are very far away from any of them and tied to the man who had fomented this crisis. To Vasiht'h, it feels like the Goddess is holding Her breath.
Jahir suggests they return to their room to rest, mentioning that he feels tired. Vasiht'h agrees, thankful that the distance he's feeling from Jahir is a result of Jahir pushing himself away and not him specifically. They're almost at their room when Borden shows up and makes a request: since they're xenotherapists and the crew has been under a lot of stress lately, could they see the crew to help alleviate some of the strain? Jahir agrees for them both and asks for details, and in the listening Vasiht'h feels the mindline socket back into place at the cost of hearing exactly how bad the ship and crew are right now. He offers to start now, and Jahir asks to see someone sleeping, though in the mindline he wonders at the ethics, since none of the crew has granted consent to this treatment. When Vasiht'h brings it up, Borden solves this by getting permission from the Captain to act as a blanket consent, and the two join hands and begin.
A few hours later, they've made it through four total crew members, and they both feel healed by the experience. Borden says she'll return if it has an effect, and heads out. They prepare for bed, but Jahir surprises Vasiht'h by hugging him and seeking comfort. Even after Jahir is asleep, Vasiht'h remains awake, the anxieties echoing in his mind. Aware that he himself is not able to help Jahir, he goes to seek someone who can.
Flashback: Lisinthir is between the Emperor and the Slave Queen, with the Slave Queen on top. Lisinthir gasps that he's being slain by the Emperor's attentions, but the Emperor credits that to the Slave Queen. She demurs, but when Lisinthir gently chides her, he senses her regret: it's sometimes difficult for her to hear such words of personhood when they've been denied her all her life. The Emperor suggests they move to their sides to continue the discussion, and they do. The Slave Queen tells Lisinthir that females do not give pleasure, males take it. The Emperor chimes in that there are no words in Chatcaavan for sexual organs or what one does with them, no language to describe, explain, or request what they do with each other. When asked by Lisinthir if she still wants this, the Slave Queen quickly reassures her that she does, but explains that this lack of words subjugates even the thoughts. Lisinthir, incredulous, then offers to teach her how to request what she might like in bed, and the Slave Queen mulls this over while the Emperor and Lisinthir banter a bit. The Queen decides she wants to learn, and asks the Emperor for permission, but he turns it back on her. Delighted, she opts to do so, but to focus first on the male parts so that Lisinthir can teach her what she'd like them to do with her. They spend several hours learning (from Lisinthir's otherwise neglected tablet) the Universal words for their body parts, with the Emperor encouraging the Queen to reveal her specific preferences and details about them, with the Queen shifting to her Eldritch form so that Lisinthir can better map terms to anatomy. After, the Queen asks whether the Eldritch have terms for parts such as that, and Lisinthir realizes suddenly that they don't, since the Eldritch speak of such things only in metaphor. The Emperor: "It seems we all shared this thing in common, then. We learned the language of pleasing one another--" Said in deliberate Universal, "--together."
Lisinthir wakes, feeling painfully lonely but hale, and knowing exactly why his subconscious dragged up that memory. He is, however, unsurprised when his door chimed and the Glaseah is there alone. Vasiht'h says he needs Lisinthir's help but is unsure if he can trust the Eldritch, and when pressed, asks if he needs to elaborate. Lisinthir expresses a desire to drink, and Vasiht'h briefly therapizes at him before apologizing. Instead, Lisinthir offers Vasiht'h the drink, who accepts and tells him that Lisinthir knows why he's here and the problem at hand. The two talk around the specifics of the issue (Lisinthir out of a mild intrigue) before Lisinthir states that Jahir is a virgin. However, Lisinthir doesn't see the problem as a problem. Vasiht'h says that Lisinthir broke Jahir's self-conception and calls him out on deflecting, which Lisinthir replies that he's doing it because Vasiht'h is accusing him of alone of emotional destruction. At Vasiht'h's horror, Lisinthir goes for his flask which he offers to the Glaseah, then asks him what Vasiht'h wants him to do about Jahir. Vasiht'h offers that he could talk to Jahir about sex, but reacts poorly to a gentle verbal parry, and so Lisinthir hugs him, offering the flask again. After checking his assumptions that Eldritch do not like to be touched (but Lisinthir, in particular, does), Vasiht'h drinks and leans into the hug. Lisinthir notes to himself that to protect is also within him, and he embraces the Glaseah as a stand in for everything he'd sacrificed to save. Noting Lisinthir's sadness, Vasiht'h asks why protecting and comforting seems to make him sad. Lisinthir deflects, saying no one on the ship has earned that level of intimacy. He encourages Vasiht'h to send Jahir, and that he'll make an effort. Vasiht'h thanks him and leaves, and Lisinthir considers drinking before going for the hekkret.
Chapter Seven
Jahir wakes before his alarm and wonders why. Seeing Vasiht'h sleeping next to him reminds him of Mercy, in addition to everything else going on. Though he's still tired, he gets up and decides to analyze the hekkret. That reminds him of interactions with Lisinthir, and Lisinthir's aggression, which makes him miss a step but he keeps moving, ignoring whatever it was that made him falter. After about a half-hour of examining the drug by itself, he feels a bit better balanced and goes to check on Lisinthir
Lisinthir, however, surprises him by smoking the hekkret openly. He looks not only relaxed, but decadent, and Jahir asks him about drinking but he says he isn't. Instead of responding to Lisinthir's bait, he starts running the tests he came there to run, being dismayed at the results before realizing that Lisinthir was under the influence of hekkret at that moment and running more tests. Lisinthir keeps looking at him, however. Jahir is a bit put off, but asks Lisinthir to place the wand by his head, noting that unlike other Eldritch, Lisinthir doesn't touch him but is very careless about doing so. Then, Lisinthir goads him into conversation about himself and Eldritch catechism, turning it into a conversation about healing that isn't Lisinthir's own. When Jahir asks for clarification, Lisinthir mentions that this wasn't going to work and tries to push off the conversation. Jahir presses, and Lisinthir tells him he was asked to talk to Jahir about sex. Baffled, Jahir asks what prompted him to that subject, and Lisinthir tells him "Say 'whoever' and ask again." The fact that Vasiht'h, of all people, asked Lisinthir blows Jahir's mind, and his thoughts race as to what could compel his brother beloved to ask a stranger to intervene when Lisinthir touches him, commanding him (gently) to stop. Lisinthir goes on to say the Glaseah was only worried he couldn't help Jahir himself, and in wondering why Vasiht'h chose Lisinthir, Jahir realizes Lisinthir is still touching him. Lisinthir says that he likes touching, but also that Jahir doesn't want Lisinthir to ask permission to do so, and wants him to take it. This resonates in Jahir, and when Lisinthir says that he doesn't rape the innocent, Jahir asks if he rapes the guilty. Before he can go more than a step down that path, Jahir pulls himself away, retrieves the wand, and leaves, his mind reeling with whatever made Vasiht'h ask Lisinthir, of all people. Feeling a headache come on, he buries himself in work.
Feeling this situation with Jahir entirely ridiculous, Lisinthir goes to find something to do and seeks the captain in the engine room. Once there, he sees the Captain at work attempting to fix the ship's massive Well drive, and the Captain detaches himself from the work so that Lisinthir can ask him if there's anything he can do to help. Enthusiastically, the Captain tells him that he can get his experiences and information on the political and military situation within the Chatcaavan Empire onto a form that can be sent out as soon as they're safe or about to be captured, since that is the most valuable asset he has aside from his own self. After receiving a reassurance that they'll get out of the situation, Lisinthir departs to do just that, reflecting on how very little the Alliance knew about the Empire before he left, and how much he was told was also wrong. When he reaches his quarters, he wakes up a data tablet and begins with a broad political analysis.
Jahir is disturbed from his work by a protein bar being brought by Vasiht'h, also discovering that he's cold. The Glaseah had talked to Hea Borden about their clients and suggested they might see more. When Jahir wonders why they wouldn't, Vasiht'h tells him he's been up for a long time, ribbing him with a cute story of him falling asleep during a client's dreams. When asked if he was closer to finished, Jahir wishes he was, since the Ambassador's health could fuel academic papers. Vasiht'h wonders at his use of Lisinthir's title, and Jahir uses that to ask why Vasiht'h asked Lisinthir to help him. Vasiht'h says he'll say later, and encourages Jahir to eat. He begins to, then realizes that he had left Lisinthir's room without administering a solution. Vasiht'h picks up on his alarm, and they rush off to find the Ambassador slumped on the table. Thinking there's no time, Jahir takes Vasiht'h's hand and reaches for Lisinthir, using their mind healing technique to calm Lisinthir's seizure. When he wakes, so does Lisinthir, who asks them (initially in Chatcaavan) what they're doing here. Vasiht'h supplies that they were assisting his seizure, and Jahir asks him if he has any more hekkret so that he can use it, supervised. Lisinthir does, and the Glaseah goes to get it. Jahir takes responsibility, since he didn't realize that Lisinthir was taking three sedating drugs, and his body has grown used to being on all three when he's now on less, it could kill him. Jahir briefly laments a lack of sample then tells Lisinthir about the supervision, which Lisinthir moves into if they administered some medicine to him. Vasiht'h explains that they have a technique to help with seizures, but misses Lisinthir's sudden menace, which only grows as Vasiht'h tells him it's a mental touch. Lisinthir balks at this, since they hadn't asked his permission, and Jahir doesn't say what he saw while inside the Ambassador's mind. Lisinthir kicks them out with mere words, sending them fleeing for the safety of their own rooms.
Jahir takes this moment to reveal that he's turned on by violence, which is why Vasiht'h had asked Lisinthir to talk to Jahir about carnal matters. Jahir tries to wave off Vasiht'h's concern, saying he can simply discipline himself against his desires, but Vasiht'h counters that said discipline often gets to the realm of repression, and they share a smile about the gentle reproach. However, Vasiht'h maintains that Jahir doesn't need to be fixed, though the Eldritch doesn't say anything to that. Vasiht'h moves the conversation onto what they will do since they need to still take care of Lisinthir, and Jahir admits he isn't sure how to regulate the dosings before saying that he needs to apologize for the mental invasion. Vasiht'h reiterates that this was the fastest way to treat the seizure, though Jahir speculates that, while Lisinthir may not be suicidal, he isn't necessarily trying to stay alive. Jahir goes for a nap, and Vasiht'h goes for a walk. As Jahir lies down, though, Lisinthir's memories -- of blood, violence, and unexpected and abundant love -- come back to him, and he wonders aloud what happened to Lisinthir in the Empire.
Lisinthir doesn't chase down the two, which he counts as a victory, because he dearly wants to hurt something. Jahir, who should have known better given Eldritch mores, seems like a good target, but then he laments that the only thing he could hurt was himself. He changes out of Eldritch clothes and into Chatcaavan ones and lights up a roll before falling into a memory of scratching the Emperor's cornea while the Emperor was on top of him. After a brief discussion about now knowing the Chatcaavan word for cornea (and, thanks to the Slave Queen, guessing there is no direct Eldritch word for it), he hisses and calls the Emperor a bastard though playfully. The Emperor looks at the wound he caused, and shrugs off the Slave Queen's call for the Surgeon but does ask her to run a bath for them. When she leaves, Lisinthir checks one last time on the Emperor, who tells him he's fine and that he'll check with the Surgeon tomorrow if it hasn't resolved itself by then. Lisinthir laughs, noting they're both unwilling to admit to pain. The Emperor, once he hears the water going, asks if the Alliance can heal old wounds, elaborating that if possible, he'd restore the Queen's wings and womb, the former he took himself but claims responsibility for both. Lisinthir says that it's possible, but it would take a true hospital, and the closest thing to a mobile facility would arrive on an Alliance warship. The Emperor muses on what a day that would be, and the two share a kiss. The Emperor then asks what a bastard is, and upon having the concept explained to him, dismisses it as useless. The thing that clings to Lisinthir, however, is a moment he finds purpose: in order for the Slave Queen to venture into the Alliance to have her womb and wings restored, both Alliance and Empire must work toward that goal.
After cleaning himself with a Pad bath, Lisinthir looks in the mirror with the Eldritch eyes Jahir left him from his invasion, and sees how badly off he is. With new resolve to survive in order to create a future for his beloveds, he resigns himself to treatment, then opts to finish smoking the hekkret and dictating more observations.
Vasiht'h really, really wants to channel his nervous energy into something productive like cooking, but he has no idea where a cafeteria even is on the ship. He wanders the ship and his thoughts, knowing that Jahir's easy dismissal of his sexuality being a problem was probably massively underestimating the issue. He saw Jahir's revulsion, shock, and fascination, so it was going to come up again. Finally, he finds the mess hall, and in it are Borden and two other crew members, people he could possibly heal. The Asanii female tells him that the galley's offline, but he could share a protein bar with them, and they have a brief conversation that segues into the current situation: The Well drive looks inoperable with their current tools and expertise. There's a plan to manuever into known patrol routes of Dusted Fleet ships, though calling for Fleet will probably also draw the dragons on them as well.
Borden mentions the therapy Jahir and Vasiht'h have been conducting, and Vasiht'h mentions that they'll get to everybody, particularly since the results have been very positive from those who have had it already. Vasiht'h compares them to a Fleet patrol for their subconscious, and they have a laugh at that. Reflecting that they were far from home, the Glaseah excuses himself and finds himself running to Jahir, telling him about the situation with the Well drive. However, Jahir seems sure that they won't die here. Vasiht'h lets Jahir lead the sessions of crew members, and gradually feels whole as they complete their work. Securing a promise that Jahir will eat, he goes to take a nap.
Jahir reads for a bit to help ease his partner's transition to sleep, but then leaves in search of the Ambassador. Lisinthir lets him in, and Jahir finds himself slightly dismayed by his carriage and his dress. Lisinthir asks if Jahir's finally going to feed him. Saying that there's another reason to he came here, Jahir opts to do that first, noting that something was different and possibly suspicious with the Ambassador. By his own admission, however, he hadn't been drinking, mostly because Jahir hadn't scheduled any for him. After injecting Lisinthir with the solution, Jahir apologizes. Lisinthir, however, does not accept, and instead demands restitution, emphasizing that by saying it again in Eldren and shading it black. When asked what he wants, Lisinthir says he wants a vulnerability from Jahir, since he took one. Jahir instantly offers his hands, but Lisinthir stops him, telling him his weakness is his flesh. Since Lisinthir won't rape him (he doesn't rape the innocent), Lisinthir wants his willingness, and asks for a kiss. Jahir balks at this, because Lisinthir has only been gone from the Empire a few days, but to Lisinthir that's the point. Lisinthir presses Jahir to consult the stolen memories, but the impressions Jahir gets are moments of violence, pain... and love, great love, love intertwined with passion, and through it all no shame. Lisinthir is silent for a few moments, then pulls Jahir to him and kisses his brow. Jahir, overcome with the face of strength made from love, finds himself intensely envious of what Lisinthir found.
While he'd intended to keep Jahir on the defensive, Jahir crumpling had ignited his guardian instincts, and Lisinthir concedes the battle, guessing that Jahir had no idea he'd won. Instead, he holds Jahir until his tumult wanes, and asks for who Jahir would love if he could. Naming his cousin, Lisinthir guesses the relation and that this is the first and only person Jahir had loved and wanted. With simply that, Lisinthir builds a pretty accurate psychological profile of Jahir, chalking it up to instincts honed among the dragons. He also credits it to having walked a similiar road, and tells Jahir that he'll answer questions about his time in the Empire. When asked if he still needed to pay with a kiss, Lisinthir reads that Jahir wants so badly some acceptance, and supplies the kiss, finding Jahir yielding to him. They kiss again, and Lisinthir introduces some pain by way of pressing his thumb near Jahir's ear. They separate, and Jahir (after regaining his breath because hoo boy, that kiss was HOT) notes that he seems to have gone from adversary to victim. Lisinthir says that this vulnerability will more than pay the restitution demanded, and chides Jahir for dismissing it as just lust: it's how Jahir's needs are being expressed and that is enticing both to those that would honor them and prey on them. Jahir correctly notes that Lisinthir will not prey on him, and Lisinthir elaborates that he is not a sadist, but is by conquest and dominance contests. Jahir, however, knows he doesn't want these things from Sediryl, and Lisinthir notes that's because he wants her with an innocent's love, and encourages Jahir to court her. When Jahir starts to say something, Lisinthir tells him not to make promises that will restrict him, and if he wants pain, Lisinthir will supply it. This confuses Jahir, and when he asks why Lisinthir would give him an outlet for these needs, Lisinthir comes back to Jahir taking his tumbler at their first real meeting. Jahir tries to dismiss it, but Lisinthir reminds him that he did it to send a message. Further, Jahir has refused to back down except in certain cases.
The two idly converse about how Jahir can pay for hearing Lisinthir's story about the Empire, which prods Jahir to ask if there are any partisans within the Empire that could provide help. After hearing the current plan from Jahir, Lisinthir basically rolls his eyes at the prey-like thinking and comes up with another plan, kissing Jahir a third time due to his continued assertions.
The two of them find Raynor on the bridge and ask to speak with him. Going to a room off the bridge, Lisinthir advances his proposal: The Chatcaava are predators, and will pounce when they hear of any transmission. So, if they send an enticing enough distress call to lure the enemy over, then take their ship and use it to tow the derelict to the Alliance. Intrigued, Raynor presses for details: get some female volunteers to record the distress call emphasizing how dire their situation is, which might spur the boarding Chatcaava to capture, not kill, and they'll probably bring their own Pads if the ship is already crippled. Lisinthir implies that he wants to lead the raid, but demurs from actually saying so, though he does need to go since he'll know the layout. Raynor dismisses him with a promise to consider the idea. In the hall, Jahir stops Lisinthir, picking up on his physical symptoms. After telling him how attractive he is in his area of authority, Lisinthir gives a useful report and Jahir opts to direct them to the clinic for a painkiller.
Jahir stops by his room, trying to figure out what to leave in a note to Vasiht'h. He writes a short one, then grabs the kit and returns to Lisinthir's room, finding him sitting cross legged in bed and smoking another hekkret roll. Lisinthir makes a crack about getting to a position of relative safety to now be dying, and elaborates that his only safety was in the Emperor's bed. Jahir takes this opportunity to ask him how the h*ck he ended up in the bed of a head of state, saying he's too confused to be revolted and that despite being in Lisinthir's mind, he doesn't know much of his experiences. Lisinthir takes another verbal swing at Jahir, then immediately apologizes because being aggressive was the only way he survived in the court. He then explains the basics of Chatcaavan society, and explains that fights are the only way to get anywhere. Since death is wasteful, they humiliate and abuse each other instead. Jahir picks up that Lisinthir got raped by the Emperor, and for shock value, Lisinthir goes on to say that Chatcaava have barbs and also he raped the Emperor back. When Jahir guesses that the intense love he felt from Lisinthir's memories was the Slave Queen, Lisinthir challenges him that it wasn't just the Slave Queen, it was the Emperor also. After a moment of rebooting, Jahir demands more information, brushing off another nascent apology from Lisinthir when the Ambassador kisses him again, undoing him. Lisinthir laughs and calls Jahir irresistible, but Jahir tells him in response that he doesn't seem very broken to him.
In this vein, Lisinthir asks him how likely it is that "a person rises above their society's teachings" and Jahir puts together that Lisinthir taught the Emperor empathy. Lisinthir also pours cold water on the notion that it was easy, saying that most of his time was suffering and he learned he didn't enjoy torture or submission at the Emperor's hands. After teaching the Emperor his shape, he was able to fully instruct the Emperor only after being tortured while the Emperor used the Eldritch ability to feel emotions through the skin. Jahir then deduces that thanks to that transformation, the Chatcaava pursuing him because he changed the Emperor, who will attempt to remake the Empire in a new image. After getting over shock at Jahir's leaps of intuition, Lisinthir states that he was sent away because he was the Emperor's weakness, because there isn't yet a place for him in the Empire. The war is not only coming, it has begun, and this is "one of its opening skirmishes."
Jahir has to take a moment to process this revelation, marveling that the Queen had enough Sight to send Lisinthir into the Empire to affect this change, and that he and Vasiht'h must have some role to play as well. But also, he may have been too credulous of this granted, implausible story. Lisinthir picks up on this, and proposes that he share a memory with Jahir, which would require that Jahir trust him. Jahir does, and Lisinthir shares.
Lisinthir stands on a balcony alongside the Emperor in his Eldritch shape, conscious of his failing body. The Emperor notes his lack of fear of the fall, saying that if he fell, he'd hope he'd be able to Change before he hit the ground. The Queen beckons them both inside, wearing her Eldritch shape, and the two oblige her. The Emperor asks if Lisinthir still considers himself a subject of the Eldritch Queen, and after considering the society tried to crush him, had humiliated his father, had created the dysfunctional relationship between his parents, but also Liolesa had seen his need to leave, he gives a bit of a non-answer: "Can one stop being what one is?" The Emperor laughs, and they kiss, and he pulls in the Queen, and in that space he says that he is what they made him, and that he's transformed them too. The Queen brings up his ring, which shows the sigil of his father's House, and he comments that he was never quite suited to his mother's. From there, they discuss his dueling past, and the fact that the Eldritch are too few to wantonly kill others for mere insult, yet dueling risked death, and he dueled often. However, it wasn't his intention to become a dueler, he simply answered the first veiled insult to Imthereli with steel, and kept answering until the insults stopped coming. It was skill to shame without killing, so that those who live can bear testament, like what the Emperor did to Lisinthir himself. When asked if he regretted leaving Lisinthir alive, the Emperor answers that he did not, and is asked to show them. Again. They see to the Queen first, and then reach for each other for a more violent kind of pleasure, though the Emperor is handicapped by fighting as an Eldritch.
Jahir is brought back from that memory by Lisinthir pushing him back into his body, and sees the moment that his skin is broken by a fingertip. Lisinthir stares at the blood, licks it up, and kisses him, and Jahir's world breaks. When he next comes aware of himself, he's blissed out hard and is leaning on Lisinthir with weak knees. Though it takes him a while, Jahir speaks... to lecture Lisinthir about hygiene and not ingesting body fluids. Lisinthir laughs at this, then kisses Jahir on his nose. Jahir, however, feels the resonance of another meaning in their touch and he wonders what he did to deserve it, and Lisinthir replies that he's everything Vasiht'h says of him and quite a lot more. He then apologizes, because Lisinthir only kissed Jahir and Jahir had hisself an orgasm from just the kiss. Before Jahir can be embarassed, Lisinthir nips that in the bud, surrounding Jahir with warmth and affection and telling him that his sensitivity is a treasure, not a liability, and for the creative to fully exploit. Continuing, he says that the situation that they're in is coercive, and if Jahir still wants the full experience, once they get out of this situation, he need only come to Lisinthir. Having said that, he directs Jahir to clean up in the bathroom, then says that he'll consent to the interventions and that he needs to live through this, thanking Jahir for trusting him. Jahir no longer feels ashamed of what he wants, and his mind drifts toward going to Sediryl as a man. He even contemplates rejection, but finds himself energized by simply considering himself able to ask. Leaving the bathroom, he suggests they both get some sleep and leads the way to his room, even trying some of the easy touch Lisinthir has. They find Vasiht'h still sleeping, and Jahir sets Lisinthir on the bunk while he grabs some coushions and sleeps in between Vasiht'h and Lisinthir, with Lisinthir extending a hand so he can keep track of any seizures the other man might have.
Chapter Eight
Vasiht'h wakes up, thinking he's in a cuddle pile with his siblings, but is disoriented when he encounters a furless arm and realizes that he's very much not. Also, the arm is Jahir's, and he's on the floor with him? Jahir seems to wake as well, and though he looks exhausted, he's also at peace. Jahir relays via mindline that the Ambassador agreed to the observation, which is why he's in the room at all, then says that Vasiht'h was right and they have a lot to talk about. Since Jahir still hasn't gotten enough sleep, Vasiht'h volunteers to go check with Hea Borden about their next move and receives in turn a promise that Jahir will call him if Lisinthir experiences another seizure. Before he leaves, he tests Jahir's serenity and finds no darkness. After observing the sleeping Lisinthir for a time, he wonders how the Ambassador got talked into this, and exactly what transpired between him and Jahir before shrugging, hoping that Jahir would tell him. He eats, has a Pad bath, and goes off to find Hea Triona.
Borden's in the mess, sorting rations and looking super tired. Vasiht'h settles down to help, and the conversation moves to Borden not sleeping well, in part due to nightmares. This is her first deployment, and any prior visits to the border were for humanitarian reasons. After a brief tangent on the word "humanitarian", she relays her past, then says that she's okay with dying in the line of duty, but not being enslaved, as that might drive her insane. Vasiht'h says she still needs sleep, and she agrees, particularly since they might go through with the Ambassador's crazy scheme. As this is the first Vasiht'h's heard of it, he asks for details and is very surprised at the audacity of it, especially since he'd rather they creeped around the borders, hoping not to be found. After saying that he'll leave military matters to experts, he cajoles Borden into being a patient for his and Jahir's next round of dream therapy, then helps her sort the protein bars.
The sorting doesn't really help Vasiht'h's feeling of impotence, though he is relieved that Jahir seems to be truly better and not just hiding things away as usual. He's nursing his ambivalence about attacking the Chatcaava when he enters his room, and finds Lisinthir awake but Jahir asleep. Vasiht'h's concern rounds on him, though he tries to deflect it, but Vasiht'h has been living with an Eldritch for over a decade and can spot the tiny details. Lisinthir attempts once again to distract Vasiht'h but the Glaseah isn't having it, and finally he gives a real report of his body while Vasiht'h notes he hasn't eaten a protein bar that's been unwrapped. Lisinthir mentions that he hasn't felt as easy in his skin, or aware of how much he did, until Jahir pushed into his mind. Vasiht'h apologizes for his role in that. Lisinthir tells Vasiht'h that he wasn't angry at him, and points out via the medallion the Glaseah wore meant he knew something of the Eldritch. Vasiht'h, while not pretending to know everything, knows that the Eldritch are dying and that he intends to be alongside Jahir to help. Lisinthir asks for the story of how Jahir and Vasiht'h met, and while Vasiht'h hesitates, Jahir wakes.
The first thing that Vasiht'h notices is that Jahir is mimicking Lisinthir's bodyspeech. He checks in with Jahir via mindline, and Lisinthir comments aloud that he finds the two of them talking fascinating, but also that he can hear them doing it, but not specifically what they say. Jahir offers that he had to go back into Lisinthir's head to get a true memory of Lisinthir's time in the Empire, since "he was a victim of serial rape, and then fell for his abuser and coerced his rapist into falling in love with him, and through that love forced him to see the errors in his culture, oh and the abuser was the Chatcaavan Emperor" is like some kind of story or something. Vasiht'h demands to know if this is true from Lisinthir, who can't say because he still can't hear the other two speak in the mindline. Vasiht'h asks if he's always unflappable, and Lisinthir returns that he spent a good month falling apart in the lap of the Slave Queen, but it takes a bit more than an irate Glaseah to faze him. Jahir says he believes Lisinthir, and Lisinthir offers a memory to the Glaseah directly to convince him, citing that his opinion matters to Jahir.
Unwilling to actually experience one of Lisinthir's memories if it was indeed torture, Vasiht'h presses Jahir on Lisinthir's veracity and Jahir invites him to evaluate the Ambassador on his own judgement, and Vasiht'h brings up nearly breaking Jahir's arm over a cigarette. Jahir takes Vasiht'h's hand and reminds the Glaseah that they had been evaluating Lisinthir by their own cultural contexts, and that Lisinthir is now also Chatcaavan a bit, and to that Vasiht'h says aloud to Lisinthir that he needs a Harat-Shariin therapist. Lisinthir asks if one is available, and Jahir has to stifle his mirth. Abruptly, however, Lisinthir switches to abject gravity, but also waits for Vasiht'h to process the abrupt change in demeanor before offering his hands. Eldritch family do touch, and Lisinthir considers Vasiht'h family of sorts. Vasiht'h takes the offer, and can feel Lisinthir's sense of purpose. He asks what changed, and Lisinthir tells him that he needs to do work to support the Emperor's aims, that they changed each other, and that the Emperor's change could get him and the Queen killed, so he still has a duty to discharge. When this confuses the Glaseah, Jahir helps out by telling him that Eldritch men are committed to duties to family, tenants, House and Queen, but barred from helping them when they die from waste and hunger because of Eldritch pride. Lisinthir chimes in that noble heirs can be even more impotent if they have titles without wealth or people, and that his father flung him at court to attempt to rekindle his dying House and left him there, making him angry, ambitious, and feeling a dire need to be useful. Jahir makes a tiny crack at himself for the disparate natures of leaving the Eldritch homeworld, and Lisinthir gently chides him for it, and Jahir accepts this to Vasiht'h's surprise. Finally, Vasiht'h gets a good look at Lisinthir and sees him coming together, and also that Lisinthir was so angry because he had purpose and this vessel was bearing him away from it.
"What a mess," says Vasiht'h, master of the understatement.
Everyone agrees, and the Glaseah notes that Lisinthir is touching Jahir but Jahir counters that Lisinthir probably needs it. Lisinthir calls Vasiht'h 'alet' but Vasiht'h suggests they call each other 'arii' instead. Jahir suggests the Alliance is Lisinthir's ward, and when Lisinthir says "for now" Vasiht'h asks him what happens after the revolution is realized. Lisinthir says that he'll live among the dragons for whatever time they have left.
Jahir offers to feed Lisinthir and give him an analgesic, and Vasiht'h contemplates what to do with Lisinthir while they're making their rounds. Lisinthir says he's fine on the couch, which prompts Jahir to tell Vasiht'h via mindline that Lisinthir is hiding his weaknesses, and that if Eldritch are stubborn on this point, Chatcaava are even more so. Vasiht'h wonders how the h*ck they get involved in these things, and Jahir tells him that they volunteer, which makes the Glaseah chuckle.
Chapter Nine
Now that he and Vasiht'h are feeling more connected, Jahir finds the work he's doing with the dream therapy going extremely well. Better because he knew these folks were going to help the Ambassador and the Captain carry out the plan that was so preposterous and brazen that it had to succeed. Briefly, Jahir muses as to whether this is trust in Lisinthir's ability, or his own hope for the future, or even the pattern sense, but dismisses those as all wishful thinking. He chalks it up to maybe just the physical release, and wonders about Lisinthir's offer. On the way to their third client, Vasiht'h comments that everyone seems better, to which the Seersa comments that since a decision is going to be made soon, and they're going to do something active about their problems, it helps. It'll be at most two days, and they might use some of the remaining power to for assaulting the enemy. In addition, two (the Ambassador aside) crew members can speak Chatcaavan and one is an expert in their tech systems. Failing that, they could take a prisoner. Vasiht'h, however, isn't very jazzed about all this violence, and is further dismayed when the question of what will happen with himself and Jahir is answered that they might join the boarding party, since it may be safer than staying behind. They stop in front of Patient Three, and Vasiht'h observes Jahir's calm in the mindline, and receives some assurance to let tomorrow take care of itself.
The two take care of Borden herself, with Vasiht'h blowing the Breath of the Goddess through her sleeping mind. In so doing, he raises the hair on Jahir's neck, though it also brings him peace. Outside the room, they talk about Jahir's new "sensual reality," which Jahir is enjoying though also hoping goes away soon. Vasiht'h comments that this is his norm, and Jahir replies that it's strange that he's been surrounded by excess luxury and never noticed. They come back to an empty room and a note: Lisinthir has gone to the "salle" and invited them to come by. Vasiht'h comments on Lisinthir's speech patterns and they depart to get him.
In said "salle," (though more a physical training room), Lisinthir is sparring with an Asanii feline hand-to-hand, and she is working hard but giving him no trouble. She begs off the spar when Jahir and Vasiht'h arrive, and after answering some brief questions as to Lisinthir's state, she leaves to go back on duty. Her parting remark makes Vasiht'h inquire, which is how they found out that the two started in Jahir and Vasiht'h's cabin, and since the couch was too small, he put his head in her lap while she sat. He asked politely, too. Vasiht'h wonders if they have to worry about Lisinthir sleeping through the crew, but Lisinthir puts those worries to rest, since he doesn't quite miss sex enough to sleep through the Alliance, particularly since it cuts close to what the Chatcaava did to Alliance slaves. He tosses Jahir a staff with an invitation to spar, and Jahir hesitates. Lisinthir supplies that Jahir might be mistaken for himself, and while sparring for an hour wouldn't enable him to falsify his fighting style, he might be fighting for his and Vasiht'h's lives very soon. And that this is therapy for him, as he's used to fighting or having sex (or doing drugs, as Vasiht'h points out). Jahir objects that he doesn't like fighting, but Lisinthir counters that he fights Lisinthir all the time, so what if the weapon is words? Further, he was bred to fight, to defend the helpless and his own honor. In addition, therapy starts with a fight for the patient's very soul, though he would call it healing. Jahir, however, refuses, throwing the staff to the side. He is calm and proud of himself for not giving in, and is soon on his knees with Lisinthir's arm locked around his throat and his own arms trapped behind him. Through their skins, he feels Lisinthir's grief and frustration.
Lisinthir again tries to get Jahir to fight, but Jahir instead gives in completely. Lisinthir feels his protective instincts take over, with Jahir saying that if he's captured by the dragons, he might find some other way to win free than fight, but that is not always productive. It's enough that he feels proud as he wins the argument, but then Lisinthir destroys that win by suggesting what if Vasiht'h is captured, and condemned to rape and slavery? When he reflexively answers "Never," Lisinthir points out that it's just him he's willing to sacrifice, and Vasiht'h picks up the staff. Jahir is struck by the Glaseah picking up a weapon, and accepts the weapon when Vasiht'h offers it, the Glaseah telling Lisinthir to "Make him practice." To Jahir, in the mindline, he demands that Jahir be more wiling to take care of himself: he has six hundredish more years, but Vasih't does not. Lisinthir, however, gently takes Vasiht'h to task, to which the Glaseah counters that he's taking Jahir down for being too passive and yet wants to stop Vasiht'h from doing the same. Lisinthir explains that the relationship between Eldritch of similar stations does sometimes involve testing, and that yielding is not always a coward's way. Perhaps Jahir errs too much on that side, but he himself errs too much on aggressive. Then, he pulls Jahir up, and bids him to hug Vasiht'h, who tells him that he always has a home with him. They have a conversation in the mindline reaffirming their bond towards one another, with Vasiht'h encouraging him to attempt to defend himself as he would Vasiht'h. Finally, Jahir agrees to practice, though he bids Vasiht'h to stay.
For Lisinthir, the session was fascinating and dismaying. It was very obvious that Jahir didn't enjoy the exercise though he had trained enough to be deft with the staff, and even unarmed Lisinthir could repeatedly beat Jahir, drilling him on how to guard his various attacks until he could defend himself at least. However, Jahir could endure almost anything, and privately Lisinthir wonders if Jahir could have lived through tortures that nearly broke him. When they were both sweating profusely, Lisinthir ends the practice and sends Jahir to go be with Vasiht'h, saying that he'll be along, and Vasiht'h whisks Jahir away. Lisinthir goes to take a Pad bath, reflecting that the Alliance was efficient, brilliant, wondrous, yet empty of the inconveniences and challenges that allowed the honing of one's own edges. And yet, the same backwards, dangerous place had created both him and Jahir. Unable to chase down whatever revelation that entailed, he goes to find Jahir and Vasiht'h, who are asleep on the floor of their cabin. Lisinthir takes the bed and immediately falls asleep, despite his misgivings to the contrary.
Flashback: post some kind of sexy interruption, the Emperor shows Lisinthir the true borders and size of the Empire, which staggers Lisinthir for its size. When he brings up the discrepancy between what the Empire told the Alliance how big it is and its true size, the Emperor says that "Lying would have required us to believe you worthy of the truth," but yes, they did, and also have been expanding. Continuously. The Emperor adjusts the map so that it splits into four quadrants, pointing out the homeworld where they used to rule from until they happened upon the Alliance and a fight, and thereby relocated the Throneworld so far forward and closer to the Alliance, closer to the perceived front. Lisinthir asks where the Emperor was born, and he says that he lived somewhere near the homeworld, his sire in the Navy, but died with no title, unremarkable, and having had no ambition. Lisinthir contrasts his own father, who was nothing but ambition and resentment and fury. The Emperor, by contrast, earned a title in the Navy within weeks and quickly ascended, dethroning a venal, incompetent, and incurious Emperor. They speak more of the map: the two larger areas are that way because they are richer in worlds, metal, and people, and each quarter is overseen by an arm of the Navy and a bureaucracy. The Navy arms used to be overseen by Chatcaava from those areas, but the Emperor switched it up, constantly shifting territory and personnel into and out of challenging, rewarding, and punishing situations. Remarking that some diversion is needful now and then, Lisinthir goads the Emperor into more violent sex before he wakes up suddenly, feeling his loneliness quite acutely.
Jahir doses him with an analgesic, but Lisinthir entreats him to "be what I need" and then drags his cousin into the bed with him, strips off his shirt, and pulls him close with his own back to the wall. When Jahir's anxiety from this positioning goes away, Lisinthir's desperation finally abates. Jahir, still fresh from sleeping, comments on Lisinthir's surprising nature, and also that his needs are complex. Lisinthir, feeling for the epiphany he was chasing in the gym's locker room, asks which need Jahir is feeding, to which Jahir answers the need for someone to protect. Lisinthir then apologizes since Jahir didn't enjoy the sparring, but Jahir waves it off, saying he gives in for fear of going too far. Lisinthir doesn't think that's it, not entirely, and decides to move the conversation to Jahir's braided hair. Jahir mentions he scandalized his servant with the habit of sleeping with it like this, but not his father, because he didn't live to see it. Sensing his quarry, Lisinthir asks if he was presented at court at the usual time, and Jahir says that he was, but left the world after a few years because he perceived himself as not accomplishing much for the Seni. His father took his duties very seriously and was much admired. Then Lisinthir looses his arrow: he speculates that Jahir thinks himself a disappointment to his mother, and a failure for not fulfilling his father's legacy. The eldest son who would be expected to marry, couldn't find someone to replace the cousin he couldn't wed. Then, the kill: "How long have you been punishing yourself for not being your father?"
Jahir is utterly floored, but can't dispute the question: his father, taken too soon, was put on a pedestal. When Lisinthir turns him so he's lying on his back, Jahir accuses him of being nothing like an Eldritch while resting in his arms. Lisinthir counters that he's everything like an Eldritch, only unconstrained by things strangling their culture, particularly those of male, noble, expendable heirs. Jahir tells him that not everything is stupid about their culture, but Lisinthir counters that he would say that because his parents loved him (otherwise it wouldn't matter so much what they thought of him), he was wealthy, had the Queen's favor, and even had a brother, and is thusly in every way born under a favorable sun, and he was not. Jahir states his desire to go back and bring home what he's learned one day to help the Eldritch thrive, and Lisinthir assures him that he will, and with his near-cousin (Sediryl?) at his side. Jahir brushes that off and posits to accept this hypothesis of his self-destructive tendencies. It sitll won't change that his first instinct is not confrontation. Lisinthir reiterates that yielding is sometimes strength, with trust being the ultimate strength. Lisinthir then sets to Jahir a task: having seen the source of his grief and the weakness (and strengths) it's made in him, it is his duty to cultivate his strength and lists off a bunch. What Jahir pulls from this is that other Eldritch doesn't think less of him for not being better at fighting. Lisinthir gives Jahir a little shake, wondering how he keeps looking for reasons to find himself unworthy of love, citing that nobody is perfect so why does he need to hold himself to a perfect standard? He may have had longer to work on hiself but also to twist himself into strange shapes.
Jahir asks why Lisinthir loves the fight. In short, he loves the moment when life and death is in his hands, and he has triumphed, though he fights to defend the innocent. In answer to Jahir questioning whether he's taking a power the divine hold, he counters that had the God and Lady not wanted them to exercise it, they wouldn't have made them capable of it, plus that to guard a life is as heady as to spend it. Jahir, to his surprise, knows this, citing that even though he's not a physician (yet), but his abilities with Vasiht'h were used to rescue victims of Wet. At Lisinthir's insistence, he shares a memory: Heliocentrus's weight dragging on his limbs, stealing his breath, but also seeing the rows of unresponsive victims... yet he manages to buy victims a few hours for families to arrive and make farewells, and the knowledge that he would and did do it all again...
Lisinthir kisses him back from the memory, and Jahir is stunned by the other Eldritch's ferocious and possessive admiration. They only separate when Jahir is gasping for air, and he feels Lisinthir's respect for him settle within him, though he's perplexed by the other's resignation, though Lisinthir quickly answers that it's due to how quickly Jahir became dear to Lisinthir. This leads into a conversation about the nature of their affection, and Jahir receives uncompromising answers that even though they love one another, they aren't about to leave their beloveds for one another, either. Neither, also, does Lisinthir think Jahir is some convenience, because Lisinthir is not capable of that. With the truth they could feel through their skin, they are able to navigate the complexities of relationships, though Jahir reflects that this is what Eldritch deny themselves, by denying themselves skin and touch. Which both is and isn't the reason Lisinthir wanted Jahir's shirt off.
They laugh and continue cuddling, though Lisinthir reveals that he's never had a milk name: no one's ever felt enough affection for him to give him one. However, Lisinthir also staves off Jahir's sympathy, because he has found love. Jahir notes that Lisinthir no longer signals intimacy by Eldritch means, and Lisinthir explains that names are contemptible in Chatcaavan culture, because titles define ones relationships to others. Then, Lisinthir clarifies his names for Jahir: "Heir" when he's being too intransigent, "Healer" in his strength, and "Cousin" because it titillates Jahir. Jahir chooses for Lisinthir "Scion" when he's being intransigent, "Ambassador" in his duty, and "Cousin" to accept Lisinthir's right to titillate him, and Lisinthir suggests they might find other titles for one another. There's more back and forth, before Lisinthir says they should sleep, ordering Jahir off the bunk and to put his shirt back on.
Chapter Ten
Vasiht'h wakes up finding the pillows next to him empty, and briefly freaks out because he thought he may have pushed Jahir away. When he brought Jahir back to their room, he was so exhausted that the mindline was filled with it, and he fell asleep immediately. He didn't have a chance to apologize for pushing Jahir into practicing with Lisinthir. But he checks the mindline and finds it filled with numbers and frustration, and goes into the other room. Jahir is there, sitting in front of the table with paper, a data tablet, and the leather case that had Lisinthir's hekkret rolls in there. When Vasiht'h makes his presence known, Jahir smiles warmly at him and inquires about his sleep. Vasiht'h sinks into the normalcy, intimacy, warmth and openness he feels through the mindline and asks what Jahir is doing, to which the Eldritch replies that he's trying to figure out how long this supply of hekkret will last. Vasiht'h also observes that this looseness of posture in Jahir is rare while they were out, but apparently he felt safe in here. He suggests that they could synthesize more, but Jahir doesn't think so as the genie is power-intensive and also offline, plus they would need to analyze it first in order for the genie to replicate it. Risking a few seizures is also not the best idea since there are too many unknowns, as Jahir further points out. They don't know what the hekkret does to him, so they can't really plan for what it will do to him when he doesn't have it, and the taper might kill him quickly. However, Jahir is puzzled at the way Vasiht'h is quiet about not wanting Lisinthir to die, then finally picks up Vasiht'h's hidden expression and reassures his partner that he isn't angry at him or Lisinthir, that forcing him to fight was "a needful thing." Leaning into Jahir's certitude, Vasiht'h asks if Jahir has forgiven the other Eldritch, and Jahir isn't sure he needed to and also that they're fond of each other.
They speak a bit of the dimension of this fondness, and Jahir makes mention of Lisinthir's aggressive admiration, which Vasiht'h questions until Jahir shares a memory of Lisinthir kissing the corner of Jahir's brow, with rue and sweetness. Vasiht'h compares it to his own experiences and memories of Lisinthir (where the Ambassador hugged him), and guesses that Lisinthir needs someone to protect. Jahir frames it as an outgrowth of Eldritch culture: "A sword set in defiance against all that would cut down the family and the House." Jahir returns to fretting about biology, and Vasiht'h offers some optimism that Lisinthir didn't have a seizure yesterday. Jahir corrects him that they think he didn't have one yesterday, as some seizures don't produce obvious symptoms. He suggests recruiting Hea Borden for further watches as she'll have the training to recognize any other seizures. Though Jahir also thinks they should talk with Captain Raynor, and suggests they call Hea Borden now.
Raynor is in the mess with -- IS THAT COFFEE? Thankfully, he invites the two to partake, and Jahir revels in the taste of something more complex than water, and a reminder of civilization. Raynor guesses, correctly, that they aren't here just to eat, and Vasiht'h nudges Jahir to take the lead. Jahir suggests that they don't wait before attempting their own rescue because the Ambassador probably needs a Medplex really badly. That, and Jahir can't quite say what is wrong with him entirely, and he's too great a value to the Alliance to just leave him at risk. However, Raynor has already decided to implement the plan, which is why there is coffee at all; the power is either going to matter or not really soon. Raynor figures that they were going to have to call for help at some point, so it would be best that any Chatcaava that come down on them will be primed to underestimate them, and worst case scenario the Chatcaava get ambushed. At this point, they're going to start preparing as soon as the Ambassador wakes, so Raynor asks them to tell the Ambassador that they're ready to go. Jahir thanks him for his time, and confirms that he will be among the crew members in the next session, then Raynor gets up to leave. However, Raynor stops at the door and tells them that there's no guarantee that they won't get involved if they are attacked, so they may want to consider their own roles in the operation. Jahir says they'll talk it over with the Ambassador, and Raynor exits the mess.
Alone in the mess, Vasiht'h laments that they don't have tea, and Jahir reassures him that they'll have tea sooner than later, and also suggests that the Glaseah take self-defense classes as well. His reaction mirrors Jahir's when it was suggested that Jahir take these classes, and feeling that Vasiht'h backs off a bit. However, Jahir still feels the Glaseah's obstinacy, so notes aloud that it's strange that Vasiht'h would recommend a course of action that he's unwilling to make himself. When Vasiht'h objects that they aren't going into a warzone again, Jahir challenges that assumption; he is a vassal of his Queen and Vasiht'h has pledged himself to the Eldritch's side. After Vasiht'h confirms his pledge, Jahir asks if the Glaseah thinks he is better suited to combat, but Vasiht'h sees the opposite, and that he should be protecting Jahir half the time... but that he thinks Jahir also believes things may inevitably come to violence, whereas he thinks violence is an aberration. The conversation cools down a bit as Vasiht'h apologizes but Jahir waves it down, but Vasiht'h tries to bring up that violence in a hospital is different. Eventually, Jahir says that all violence is cruel and ugly and can kill, and they can't afford to be ignorant of physical violence anymore. When asked if he thinks this won't be over when they get back, all Jahir can say is that while he might hope so, he'd rather they be prepared. Ultimately, Vasiht'h in the mindline wishes that they lived in a world without Chatcaava, but Jahir thinks about how the Chatcaava changed Lisinthir, given him life and purpose. Eventually, they decide to bring Borden back a cup of coffee.
Back in the room, Borden is staring at Lisinthir who is draped artfully over the couch. Apparently Lisinthir had pain that culminated in vomiting, but hid it so well that she didn't know until he told her after he'd already done it. Borden also has no idea how the vial feeding would have triggered the vomiting, as they're bypassing the digestion entirely. They can't find out for sure short of putting him under a halo-arch, and Vasiht'h mutters that he doubts the Captain will authorize that as they're about to go up against the dragons. Jahir gives Borden the coffee cup, and she enjoys just the smell while he makes sure that Lisinthir hasn't seized. Jahir turns on Lisinthir in Eldritch, who teases back in the same though giving away with his raspy voice that he was very much in pain. Lisinthir also doesn't say what came up, and Jahir asks him if he kisses Lisinthir, will he taste blood? Lisinthir dares him to, and Jahir asks the others to leave the room, telling Vasiht'h in the mindline that Lisinthir needs disciplining, otherwise he'll be fighting them the whole time over his own health. With them two alone, Lisinthir begins to make a crack before he stops, and Jahir finds that he'd grabbed the front of Lisinthir's shirt. Lisinthir complains that this is his last shirt, and Jahir tells him not to struggle before he does kiss them, collecting data first, then concentrating on the kiss as demonstration. Lisinthir goes along with it, quite content, and when Jahir comes up for air, Lisinthir tells his cousin that he has made his point beautifully.
After a little more light teasing, Lisinthir gives a report that he didn't vomit blood, but also that he loves to see Jahir fight him with grace, as he's graceless otherwise. To answer Jahir's shock, he continues: he loves the sight of Jahir in his power, and that he's hiding his pain with a great deal of effort and a lot of practice. Jahir starts to think of other ways to dispel the pain, and calls back the other two. Jahir sends Borden off to report that the Ambassador will be there shortly, and when she leaves, he proposes to Vasiht'h that they improvise a nerve block. Lisinthir, who can't hear their mindspeech, asks them if he gets to know what they've been talking about, and Jahir sidesteps that while just telling him to endure, since he's distracting. Lisinthir turns to Vasiht'h, and Vasiht'h tells him it could be worse, he could be annoying. "Oh no. I am never annoying. I skip directly from distracting to infuriating. Saves time," Lisinthir says in response. Vasiht'h shakes his head in the mindline, then joins hands with Jahir as he touches Lisinthir to apply the nerve block.
Jahir leads the way and starts soothing Lisinthir's irritated pain. When he comes back, he wonders if it worked but forgets to speak aloud. Lisinthir answers that it did work, and compliments him wonderfully in Eldren. Lisinthir then flusters the both of them by thanking Vasiht'h as well with a hug, kissing the top of his head. Finally, Jahir relays the Captain's request to see him, and Lisinthir stands, saying he's glad Jahir didn't rip his shirt since it's his last one. He turns down Jahir's suggestion to borrow one of his, since Jahir is taller. Jahir wonders if Lisinthir is an Eldritch again, and Lisinthir says he never stopped being one, just that the Captain is expecting an Eldritch ambassador and he's gotta dress the part. When Jahir brings up what he'll wear when fighting Chatcaava, Lisinthir says he'll wear Eldritch clothes: One, so Jahir might be mistaken for him, and he's going to use that to their advantage, and two, if they get their talons caught on his clothing, he can use that to his advantage. He then makes sure that Jahir will attend him after his meeting with the Captain, since they have practice to observe.
Chapter Eleven
Watching Lisinthir coach the Fleet officers both horrifies and fascinates Vasiht'h. He wonders via mindline if the Chatcaava are going to notice all the small details that he's suggesting, and Jahir replies that even if they may not know consciously, they will know. They're sitting at the back of the bridge, monitoring the Ambassador's health, conscious that his knowledge was worth more to the Alliance than any of their lives. Vasiht'h honors that conviction, and knew he should be feeling it, but he doesn't. Worst yet, he can sense that core in Jahir, had sensed it since their very first meeting. He might not have a fighter's instincts, but Jahir valued some abstract ideals above his own life. Vasiht'h himself could imagine doing anything to protect people he loved, but wasn't as sure about throwing himself into a war because a queen said so.
He'd imagined promising himself to Jahir's side meant something like returning to the Eldritch homeworld and having kids, not looking for trouble. While it wasn't something the Glaseah thought he could do, he had to worry about what she'd think Jahir could do, and Vasiht'h had to follow Jahir. Of course, Lisinthir's masterful manipulation makes him relieved that this killer is on their side. He had a strong command of this particular psychology, all of it intuitive, and the results of recording shocked Vasiht'h with how even he, as a very poor predator, could read fear and defeat from these three women. And then, Lisinthir went for more takes, with the officers getting into it and adding their own suggestions.
Vasiht'h is so rattled at this point that he doesn't want to ask Jahir if he thought less of Vasiht'h for not wanting to give up his life for any of this for fear of the answer. He knew that eventually Jahir would find out, and would still love him, but he couldn't stand if Jahir lost respect for him over this.
Three hours later, Lisinthir had a transmission that he would bet his life would lull any Chatcaava. He hoped that they would have time to send out a few more, to develop the narrative of this damaged cruiser, making a note to discuss it with the Captain later. He then goes to his therapists and suggests now is a good time to practice. However, when Jahir rises, Vasiht'h rises a beat later, and this asynchronicity sticks out to Lisinthir since they usually move in tandem. He guessed that this time it had been a result of Vasiht'h reticence instead of Jahir's, and hoped he hadn't caused this one like the last few, not wanting to cause them distress.
Jahir compliments him on his orchestration, and Lisinthir passes that off to the women who he coached. Vasiht'h asks if it's time to feed Lisinthir, and then volunteers to go get it, moving ahead of them as the three move from the bridge. For extra privacy, Lisinthir switches to Eldren when he asks if there's a problem between Jahir and Vasiht'h, since usually that kind of conversation takes place without words. Jahir comments, in shadowed mode, that there are new strains on them as people as a result of the situation. As more evidence of how dear Jahir and his Vasiht'h had become to him, Lisinthir discovers he doesn't want to prod at this pain he sees.
In the gym, Lisinthir gets Jahir's staff and brings it to him, brushing off the other Eldritch's concerns about eating and the cold and teases him instead. He insists, however, on starting the sparring session before Vasiht'h returns with his meal, and they're at it a good ten minutes before the Glaseah shows up. While unable to hear the apology, he could read it in their bodies, though it doesn't dissolve the tension between them. As Jahir prepares the AAP and uses it on him, he keeps a surreptitious watch on Vasiht'h, wondering why the Glaseah was so uncomfortable.
But then Jahir takes up the staff after putting away the medical supplies and asks Lisinthir to teach Vasiht'h as well, which freezes the Glaseah in place. Noting that hesitance, he says in deliberate Universal "Teaching requires the consent of the taught." Vasiht'h says he's willing, but instead of starting the lesson, Lisinthir deliberately goes to get some water.
As soon as he leaves, Vasiht'h hissed in the mindline that he didn't mean now to start this, and Jahir counters that if not now, when? Further, now is when he needs it, and it is a necessity. Vasiht'h ends up saying -- even though he desperately doesn't want Jahir to hear it -- that he doesn't want to, and Jahir tells him that they do what they must or they may not make it home. Jahir also tells him that he is perfectly capable of sacrifice, seeing as he nearly bled out attempting to hide a dagger that would start a war. Vasiht'h protests that it wasn't a real scenario, but Jahir counters that it was plenty real to the Glaseah, confused at this new side to his partner but unable to love him any less. Again, the Glaseah protests that it was for Jahir, because it meant so much to Jahir, and so Jahir tells him to do this for him if Vasiht'h loves him.
This... hurts Vasiht'h, enough so that Lisinthir's reemergence was a welcome distraction, doubly so when he asks a very strange question of Vasiht'h: "Can you dance?" The Glaseah says that he can, and Lisinthir asks to see, saying that they can probably order music from the ceiling or walls. When he goes to do so, the Glaseah pipes up that there's a pronk station out of Alpha that he likes, and also says that Jahir can dance, which Lisinthir dismisses because he was probably taught out of the nursery. He finds something likely, then plays it. Jahir still has no idea what Lisinthir is up to, but guesses that he's trying to cut through all their existing channels to find a new equilibrium.
After commenting on the music, Lisinthir then asks Vasiht'h to teach him to dance to pronk. While still disoriented, the Glaseah takes Lisinthir's hand and begins, and Jahir retreats off the mat to allow them the space. The combination of Vasiht'h's innocent happiness and Lisinthir's sensual understandings made for a stark and nearly unforgettable image in his mind, plus as they went on, the mindline cleared of grief, fear, and revulsion. As Vasiht'h proclaims Lisinthir sufficient, Lisinthir waves the volume down and reveals his true motive: to see if Vasiht'h has the same precision of awareness of his lower body as his upper. Since more than half of him is over the shoulder, if Lisinthir attacks him from a blind spot, he could be disabled or killed. Vasiht'h begins to object to the use of dancing to see his body movements, but Lisinthir lightly brushes that off as he beckons Jahir back onto the mat, saying he wants to test something else. When Jahir is ready, Lisinthir calls on Vasiht'h to defend as he attacks Jahir. The Glaseah pushes him out of the way, then leaps backward as Lisinthir goes after him, drawing Jahir into the fray.
They practice for uncountable hours, with Lisinthir not letting them rest or regather their wind until Jahir was just cognizant of where Vasiht'h was in space, where he was in relation, and what hurt on their bodies. Abruptly, Lisinthir calls a halt, tells them to drink something, and proclaims that proper exercise. The point, to Vasiht'h's annoyed question, was training them to fight, by giving them something worth fighting for, and to demonstrate that they can't be trained alone as their greatest asset is each other. Vasiht'h reflexively rejects becoming a formidable pairing, though Jahir detects a trickle of interest. Finally, Lisinthir apologizes for the methods before saying "Cousin, I believe I am about to faint," and doing so.
Jahir manages to catch him, and wraps an arm around Vasiht'h before jumping into Lisinthir's mind to fight off the seizure. The fight is overwhelming at first, but with the Glaseah's support and keeping him grounded, Jahir finds himself with a sword, cutting away the demons that lurked until there was a cool wind. He's back in his body after, trembling with Vasiht'h holding him up. Jahir suspects, and Vasiht'h confirms, that it was a close call, almost deadly. Lisinthir wakes and compliments Jahir, and Jahir bids him say it again in Eldren to confirm that he's okay, and he does, spangling the words with gold and white. Jahir mentions in Universal that they're going to get Borden to watch him while they do their thing with the rest of the crew, Lisinthir asks -- still in Eldren, and with shades of white, gold, silver, and red, if Jahir will be what he needs. Amazed and delighted, Jahir says "As if you could be denied." Finally, he gets up, gently entreats them to come more willingly to their practices for as many as they have left.
Chapter Twelve
The therapists leave Lisinthir with Triona, but also Cory and Sharil, or the three ladies he'd been coaching on the bridge earlier because the latter two had asked to come along. Vasiht'h speculates that if he wanted to, Lisinthir could probably have a different person in his bed every night for all ten centuries he had left. Not that he'd want to. This brings Vasiht'h to the thought that Lisinthir actually wants his dragons... and also Jahir. As much as he might want this to bother him more, the upcoming war and Lisinthir's involvement in it (and Jahir's plan to be involved) kinda overruled that. Additionally, the Glaseah was still feeling a bit guilty from almost breaking his promise to Jahir, and that he feels less confident on his ability to follow through on that promise as well. And yet... seeing Jahir begin to unfurl meant Vasiht'h couldn't regret coming to this situation. More than anything, he wants Jahir to see this transformation to its end, and still hates what this situation is doing to him.
Jahir continued leading the sessions since he didn't have the focus, with Borden giving them names and trusting them to find the rooms. However, tonight was less anxiousness and more nervousness born of anticipation. When they get to the Captain's quarters, he wakes up briefly before going back to sleep, and his dreams weren't helpful to Vasiht'h, either: he was a man of action and wanted to do something, being held back by the Pelted again and again. He didn't need them.
For once, Vasiht'h feels colder than Jahir, wondering at the sanity of anyone, at how much he belongs here among all these aggressive people. All he wants to do is be safe and home! Worst yet, he can't speak to the person he'd usually speak to about these thoughts, Jahir. Jahir, who checked up on him on their way back to their rooms, with him revealing the tiniest bit of his anxieties by telling Jahir he was afraid, leaving out that it was fear of this situation being over soon.
When they re-enter their room, the women were still there with the Ambassador asleep, though he'd only gotten to sleep an hour prior. Jahir answers an indirect question about whether Eldritch have wild parties with more Eldritch truth wrapped in misdirection, though Vasiht'h picks up that Jahir only answers like that if it has to do with the Veil or client confidentiality. The ladies excuse themselves and leave him and Jahir alone, when Jahir finally confronts the Glaseah on feeling out of sorts. Vasiht'h says he needs sleep, then further says (after Jahir looks at him for a while) that he's doing miserably and not holding it together too well. Jahir gives him a shoulder touch reminiscent of their time together before this incident, which gives Vasiht'h hope that the old Jahir is still in this new Jahir, and maybe a love not poisoned by contempt or condescension would be in there, too. After a brief conversation where Jahir gives Vasiht'h a little pep talk, Jahir tells the Glaseah to use the bathroom first as they get ready for bed, though Vasiht'h is still plagued by anxieties.
Flashback: A kind memory of Lisinthir untangling the Slave Queen's hair while the Emperor is away on some flight, with Lisinthir grateful for the respite because the Emperor was too intense, and time smears in his presence. Now, he can slow down, fingers soft with the cream he had just smoothed into her hide. While admiring her hair, he abruptly notices that there are no ornaments in it, and tries to remember of she had any beads in it when he first arrived and she was presented. The Queen replies that they decorate horns, fingers, arms, ankles, and in her case wings, but not the hair. She notes that he used to, and he expands that it's customary as a sign of wealth and power for males and females both. The Queen reflects that Chatcaava only decorate females but leave themselves unadorned, though Lisinthir points out that the males grow their own adornments, further that if others take horns from you, then you are craven and unfit for titles. Unfortunately, Lisinthir brings up the last remaining bit of jewelry which came with the wings, and she despairs because her wings were taken from her, and now that she's with the Emperor so often, she's constantly reminded of what she cannot have.
To distract her, Lisinthir asks her "Do you know how I admire you?" He tells her that she's the strongest Chatcaavan she's ever met; Even the Emperor wouldn't have weathered her imprisonment with her grace. The Queen calls it apathy, but the Ambassador tells her that she could have pushed him away, did not have to aid strangers and aliens. He reminds her that someone defeated couldn't have helped him free the Heir and the rest of the slaves. Besides, she could have thrown herself from the window, particularly when living was the harder course.
As she laughs it off, he tells her "Courage often goes unrecognized in those who show no obvious fear," and calls her actions bravery in the face of such circumstances. Besides, her patience and strength have paid off, because now she's here, in a place where she is fulfilled. The Queen laughs, confirms she's happy, and hugs him, saying that she's interested in the story of the Slave Queen with courage. When asked how she might end this story, she grabs him, telling him that she won't write one because she doesn't want it to end, and they spend some time together, delighting in each other.
Lisinthir wakes up to find Jahir just settling down for bed. It was far too late for him to be up. Lisinthir says that he woke up because of a headache and his dreams when asked, but Jahir tells him that the latest test results perplex him and he needs the care of a dedicated healer-specalist. But when asked what the real reason is, Jahir admits that he's worried about his partner. Lisinthir brushes it off as nerves, but Jahir speaks of what comes after, since this war is only beginning. He knows that Vasiht'h doesn't want anything to do with this war, and that he will be involved in it, especially since he lives in the Alliance. Lisinthir lets him get it all out, and then directs Jahir to come with him, bringing him to the gym.
The gym was, as expected, deserted, but instead of fighting, Lisinthir tells Jahir that he didn't dance earlier, and suspects that the lessons all Eldritch nobles were taught took better in Jahir than it did himself. Also, that Jahir sings when he heals. Truth as it was, it was delivered to help Jahir loosen up, and with the other Eldritch distracted, he goes to the wall and builds up music so that it starts stately and ends wild. Moving back to Jahir, he bows. Jahir hears the music and says it reminds him of summer court, but when Lisinthir moves to dance, he objects that one usually dances with the opposite sex. Lisinthir, enjoying bringing Jahir out of himself, mimes a curtsey as he says he'll take the women's role. When Jahir reaches out, he stops, because Eldritch dance requires props, and Jahir has none. Lisinthir takes hold of Jahir's hand, pointing out that this is what they're refusing each other. They begin to dance, and Jahir figures out that Lisinthir wants to demonstrate something. Lisinthir plays coy, but Jahir detects the other man's positioning as if for battle. Lisinthir goes on to say that the Eldritch overcorrected and gave themselves too much distance, because the danger was in the moments before intimacy. However, Lisinthir posits that intimacy was not the greatest peril, but when people are vulnerable together is when they are safest. "When we hold ourselves apart to keep from being hurt, we accomplish nothing but the denial of nourishment."
Jahir, his breath a bit shivery, objects that close means you are close enough to be hurt, but Lisinthir counters that hurting requires separation. Finally, Jahir says that he's afraid he and Vasiht'h will be torn apart, but Lisinthir tells him that if Vasiht'h is truly with Jahir, then that is safety, no matter what happens or where they are. They continue dancing at Lisinthir's behest, the music accelerating and loosening something in Jahir until Jahir noticed what was playing, making the connection between the two genre's Lisinthir had the computer stitch together. Lisinthir then runs through the next few steps of the argument, making Jahir laugh. But in their closeness, Jahir guesses that Lisinthir is about to kiss him, and Lisinthir tells him that "It wouldn't do to be predictable."